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Untamed Page 3
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“I said the same to Grayson. The director may want us handling the majority of raids, but that doesn’t mean the admiral agreed to it. He’s taking it one request at a time. Bottom line, he doesn’t want us becoming the scapegoat if the intel is wrong.”
“We should let the Feds take care of their own damn problem.” Ghost’s attention slipped to the picture on Wrath’s wall of the boys they’d rescued on the last assignment. “The thing is, those kids need a chance, no matter who takes on the mission.”
“According to Grayson, we’re in a better position than the Feds. Our undercover status gives us an edge in most cases. For now, he’s limiting us to missions where transport is through Arizona or New Mexico. Which brings me to Grayson’s latest correspondence.”
Turning around, Wrath grabbed a document from the printer, handing it to Ghost. Scanning it, his eyes narrowed.
“Tonight? Doesn’t give us much time.”
“That, my friend, is why we’re being tagged. It’s close to home, and we can deploy a lot faster than any other team.”
“We’ll need more men than last time, Wrath. Four isn’t going to be enough to rescue a dozen kids.”
“This might be a good time to mix it up. Five of the Posse and a few newer guys. You, Rock, Gunner, Moses, and Tracker, plus two or three others we still need to identify.”
“Wrangler is not going to like being left out, Prez. Missions, training, the gym, and Robbie’s are all that’s keeping him on even footing. Remember, if he’s not with us, he’ll be your pain in the ass.”
Standing, Wrath paced to the bulletproof window with a view to the newly rebuilt garage and warehouse. “Seeing Becca again really messed him up. When she got in his face at Robbie’s, I thought he’d come unglued.” Turning, he crossed his arms, leaning against the wall. “From what I know now, it’s his own damn fault. All this time, we thought it was Becca who ghosted, not my brother.”
“Whatever happened, he’s beating himself up over it. The only time he’s focused is in training or on a run. I say he goes with us tonight. Believe me, you don’t want to deal with a pissed off Wrangler right now.”
Rubbing his chin, Wrath thought about all the times he’d meant to sit down with his brother, talk out what had gone down ten years ago. New additions to the club and added missions hadn’t provided the time.
“I should’ve talked to him before now.”
“Trust me. The guy’s not ready to have a heart-to-heart with his big brother.”
“I don’t give a shit if he’s ready or not. I’ll plug him into the mission tonight, but afterward, we’re getting whatever’s bothering him into the open. At some point, it’s going to affect the team, and I will not let that happen.”
Chuckling, Ghost stood, tossing the mission details on the desk. “Include Ethan. It might require both of you to get through Wrangler’s thick head.”
Purse slung over her shoulder, Becca carefully juggled her cup of coffee while holding two thick legal books. Approaching the desk, a sigh of relief burst forth when the heavy tomes slipped from her arm without jostling the coffee.
After tucking Jamie into bed last night, she’d stayed up until well after midnight studying the complexities of family law. She might not be in school, but Becca held out hope of returning for a law degree. Glancing at the framed picture of her son, she acknowledged it might not happen until long after he’d graduated from high school.
Her chest tightened, the thought of Jamie growing up reminding her of the upcoming barbeque. And Quinn.
She’d thought more than once about calling Tessa, giving her regrets. Each time her finger hovered over the number, Becca forced herself to slip the phone away. Living in Liberty Lake, it wouldn’t take Quinn long to learn about her having a son. Once he discovered Jamie’s age, it wouldn’t be hard to piece everything together and confront her. It would be best for her to pick the time and place, and it appeared both had already been determined.
“Good morning.” Cara blew into the office with her usual morning smile and uncommon energy for a pregnant woman close to four months along.
“You’re in early.” Becca watched Cara rush through the door of her office, dropping what she held onto the desk. “Do you want coffee?”
“Decaf would be great.”
A few minutes later, Becca handed her a full cup, turning to leave.
“Do you have a few minutes to go over some files you prepared?”
“Let me grab my notebook.” Returning to the front, she picked up the pad, then heard the door open. Looking up, she gasped and took a faltering step backward, almost stumbling before catching herself on the arm of a chair.
“Quinn. I mean, Mr. McCord.”
Heart tripping, an aching knot building in her chest, she glanced at the framed image of her son. Their son. Gripping the calendar, she scanned the page, sending up a prayer he wouldn’t walk around the desk to look over her shoulder.
“I don’t see you on the calendar.”
Sitting down, she did the same with the scheduling program on her computer, licking her lips as apprehension pulsed through her. He could not find out about Jamie. Not this way, not today.
“You aren’t on this calendar either.” When he didn’t respond, she looked up to see his gaze locked on her. “Mr. McCord?”
Her use of his last name galvanized him. “It’s Quinn, Becca. Mr. McCord is my father.”
Lips thinning, she lifted her chin, ignoring his comment. “Did you come in for a meeting with Cara?”
“No. I stopped by to talk with you, if you have time.”
“Not possible. I’ve got a full schedule.”
Raising a brow, he crossed his arms. “Then it will have to be lunch or dinner.”
Standing, she pressed her hands on the desk, leaning toward him. “I have plans for lunch, and dinner tonight, and tomorrow night, and the night after that. In fact, I don’t recall a single night in the future where you’ll play a part.” She didn’t realize how much her voice had risen until noticing Cara standing a few feet away.
“Is everything all right?”
Becca straightened, never taking her gaze from Quinn’s, sending up a second prayer her boss wouldn’t do anything to draw his attention to the photo.
“No. Mr. McCord was just leaving.”
Moving closer, Cara touched her brother-in-law’s arm. “Did you want to see me?”
Rigid features softening, he covered her hand with his. “Not this time.”
“Then what brought you here today?”
“I came to talk with her.” He gave a quick nod in Becca’s direction.
Irritation flashed before she shoved it aside. “Unfortunately, my schedule is too busy for a discussion of old times.”
Taking his arm, Cara guided him into the hall, closing the door behind them. “You can talk to her at the barbeque on Saturday.”
“I’d hoped for time to say what’s needed without being surrounded by a bunch of people.”
Pressing a hand to her growing stomach, Cara leaned against the wall. “And what is needed? More of what everyone heard in Robbie’s parking lot?”
Rubbing the back of his neck, he grimaced. “No.” He looked at the closed door. What had seemed a good idea a few hours ago had gone to hell the instant he’d walked into the office. “I want to explain, Cara. Walking away wasn’t as simple as Becca thinks.”
She loved her brother-in-law, hated to see the easygoing man struggle with a grave mistake in his past. “Did you truly mean to never contact her again once you left for the Navy?”
Throat thickening, he nodded. “Yeah, I guess I did.”
Eyes widening in surprise, she shook her head.
“You didn’t expect me to admit it?”
“Maybe.” Cara studied his face. “Mostly, I don’t understand why you want to dig up the past if you don’t love her. You cut ties with Becca years ago. Why hurt her further?”
Lifting his hands, he scrubbed both through his hair,
letting out a deep breath. “I don’t know. I just…” Taking a few paces away, he turned back, placing a fisted hand over his heart. “She’s still here. I’ve never gotten Becca out of my system.”
“I see.” Although she didn’t. “Do you still love her?”
Jaw clenching, he gave an abrupt shake of his head, not answering.
Which was a lie. He’d known the instant he’d spotted her at Robbie’s that his love had never died.
What he’d believed to be the best course of action ten years ago now seemed selfish, the coward’s way of dealing with a commitment he hadn’t been quite ready to make. He’d desired freedom to travel, the chance to meet other women, time to make certain what he felt for Becca was real.
It took ten years and a surprise reunion to realize the depth of his mistake. Now he couldn’t get her out of his thoughts. Not by volunteering for every mission or the quantity of alcohol he consumed.
For those reasons, his older brothers had dragged him out of a semi-stupor the evening before, pounding on his front door until he stumbled to open it. They didn’t wait to be invited inside, shoving the door wide and stalking past him.
The mission to rescue the children the night before had been a bust. Not one bit of intel had proven correct. The nine teammates had kept their positions, watching, weapons ready, but after nine hours, Wrath had called it off.
Since returning, he’d attended a short debrief, a subsequent meeting with Wrath, Ghost, and Rock, and spent an hour in the gym before heading home. He’d wolfed down a sandwich with more than a couple beers and fallen asleep. Wrangler didn’t know how long he’d been out when Wrath and their middle brother, Sheriff Ethan McCord, arrived, insisting they discuss his history with Becca.
The intervention didn’t go as his older brothers had expected. Wrangler’s mea culpa stayed buried inside. The only person who’d hear it would be Becca, assuming she ever spoke to him again.
Over several cups of coffee, he’d once again admitted, as he’d done in Robbie’s parking lot, the split had been all on him. Not until seeing her again did Wrangler understand the depth of the devastation he’d left behind. After all this time, her hatred for him raged, the pain of his departure flashing in her eyes with each hotly spoken word.
Weeks later, he hadn’t been able to get her out of his mind. Each night started the same. A beer followed by a shot of whiskey, repeating until his brain had numbed, until he accepted the real problem.
He wanted a second chance with a woman who despised him.
Chapter Four
A low moan escaped Becca’s lips, the pleasure too intense. Quinn continued to suckle one pink nipple, his teeth scraping over it before soothing the aching nub with a slow swipe of his tongue.
Wrapping her arms around his neck, she tried to tug him on top, his chuckle signaling he wasn’t letting her take control.
“Not yet, Bec. I haven’t had enough of your sweet taste.” Lifting his head, he captured her mouth in a searing kiss, his tongue delving inside as his hand massaged one soft globe before moving to the other.
Slipping one hand down their bodies, she wrapped her fingers around his thick, hot erection, squeezing lightly before stroking. In one quick move, Quinn grasped her wrist.
“Not yet, babe. It will be over much too soon.” Releasing her, he cupped her mound, fingers playing in the soft, silky curls.
Moving his mouth to one breast, he sucked deeply, feeling her arch against him as his hand delved between her moist folds. Slipping two fingers inside, he thrust in and out, feeling her body writhe with heat and growing need.
Her wild response always amazed him, creating a burning need no other woman could fulfill. When the sweet torment became unbearable, he rolled on top, pushed her legs apart, and thrust inside.
She pushed against him, meeting each thrust. His pace increased, becoming urgent and frenzied as his skin slapped against hers. Burying her face in his neck, she rasped out his name on a burst of release so powerful, it robbed her of breath. He thrust two more times, surging forward to follow her over the edge.
Becca slowly opened her eyes, unexpected tears streaming down her face. She hated these dreams. Would do anything never to experience another.
Over the years, they’d become too intense and much too real. Since running into him at Robbie’s, the dreams had come more often, robbing her of sleep and messing with already fragile emotions when it came to the man she still loved.
She wanted to hate him, prayed to feel disgust and scorn for the man who’d left her and their unborn child behind. No matter how she tried to harden her heart, the efforts were useless. One look at him and all the years melted away. To her consternation, the hate went with it.
It didn’t mean she ever wanted to rekindle what they’d had. Never again would a man hold the power to crush her with one selfish act. As much as Becca still loved him, wished they’d faced life together, she refused to be so vulnerable a second time.
Becca’s hands shook as she laid a clean shirt and jeans on Jamie’s bed. He’d spent the morning at a baseball camp before they walked to a nearby skate park. On the way home an hour later, they stopped for burgers and fries.
She glanced at the World of Warcraft clock on the wall. “An hour before the barbeque starts,” Becca mumbled to herself, debating whether to be stylishly late or arrive just in time to eat and leave.
Taking her shower, then drying her long, golden brown hair, she let the thick waves fall over her shoulders. The way Quinn liked it.
A rush of annoyance pushed her to grab a band, combing her hair into a ponytail. Looking in the mirror, a small grin curved her lips. Very small and very tentative. All she allowed herself most days.
Other than Jamie, there’d been little to smile about over the years. They celebrated birthdays, holidays, and milestones, such as good report cards and a raise in her wages. She’d raised Jamie on her own, with an occasional twenty or thirty dollars from her mother.
Attaining her paralegal degree had doubled her take home pay, added benefits, and still allowed her to work a couple shifts each week at a nearby café. She and Jamie were still close with the older woman who’d taken care of him.
Mrs. Bowles had refused all but a small amount of money each week, preferring to trade her babysitting services for trips to the grocery, drugstore, and favorite Mexican restaurant. It had worked well for both, until Becca had accepted the job in Liberty Lake.
Jamie loved the woman who’d become more of a grandmother than sitter, necessitating frequent trips back to Phoenix. Maybe she should’ve begged off the barbeque today and headed south, instead of feeling as if she were walking a tightrope. A precarious situation she couldn’t afford to fail.
She moved to the bathroom door, knocking. “Jamie, are you out of the shower yet?”
“Yeah, Mom.”
“The clothes you picked out are washed and on the bed.”
The door swung open, a bright smile flashing across Jamie’s damp face as he looked out. “Really? Thanks, Mom. I didn’t think you’d have time to wash them.”
Ruffling his damp hair, her heart swelled. “I’m going to change. We’ll leave here in half an hour.”
“This is going to be a totally awesome day.”
Becca hoped so, but a nagging sense of foreboding had persisted for days, ever since Cara mentioned the barbeque. It had grown worse after Quinn stopped by the office. His presence threw her off, fear rearing up, afraid he’d spot the framed photo of Jamie.
It had taken months to perfect the poised, sophisticated persona she wanted others to see. Inside, she’d always be the outdoorsy tomboy who had driven her parents crazy. The same characteristics which had first attracted Quinn to her.
What she’d give to join a community softball or soccer team. Becca would love a place to go on Saturday mornings while Jamie had practice, giving her a chance to meet other women.
She picked out jeans, a white blouse, and sandals, slipping into them. Grabbing her brush,
she pulled loose the ponytail and brushed out her hair. Becca searched for peace, knowing she’d need it for the storm to come. She began talking through what she planned to tell Quinn.
After several minutes, she pulled her hair back into a ponytail, closing her eyes. “This is a nightmare.” Her mumbled words underscored the fear she felt at the coming confrontation. Becca had no doubt it wouldn’t be a civil conversation. She hoped it didn’t escalate into a shouting match with everyone standing nearby, as had happened at Robbie’s. Worse, a fight couldn’t happen with Jamie within earshot.
Only one person in Liberty Lake knew of his existence. Becca didn’t know why she hadn’t thought of this earlier. Picking up her phone, she touched Cara’s number, hoping she’d pick up.
“Do not tell me you’ve changed your mind and aren’t coming, Becca.”
“Not changing my mind, but I do need to ask for your help.”
“Hold on. I’m standing next to Wrath, Tessa, and Ghost. We came early to help set up.” Cara’s voice lowered as she walked. “Okay, what can I do for you?”
“You’re the only person in town who knows about Jamie and that Quinn is his father.”
“Right…”
“I need you to be with Jamie when I ask Quinn for a few minutes to talk. I’m afraid the discussion might not go well, and I don’t want Jamie in the middle of it. And I definitely don’t want him overhearing us.”
“No problem. I think Rock and Tessa invited neighbors who have children. I might even put him on Travis duty.”
“Tessa’s son?”
“He’s just over two, and normally a real sweet boy. Some days, though, he can be a handful.”
“That would be wonderful. Thanks, Cara. Jamie and I will see you soon.”
You’re making a mistake. You’re making a mistake.
The thought took hold, repeating over and over on the drive to Tessa’s. Becca’s panic increased with each mile, her doubt rising to the point she couldn’t draw a full breath.
What had seemed the perfect place and time to have the most crucial conversation of her life now felt wrong. She glanced over at Jamie, her heart melting. Handsome, inquisitive, smart, and so much like Quinn.